Login
  

My Diary View Diaries New Diary Search FAQ Site Map Contact
HOME
View Diary


   


Impromptu
by lostwingsxoxo
( 28, Female )

[ Previous Entry - Next Entry - Diary Contents - Calendar View ]


Weekend
03-04-13 02:57 PM

One of my Marfan friends that I met on Facebook is having heart surgery.  I don't really know him at all, but he was one of the first people I met who had Marfan Syndrome, too.  I hope he pulls through.  He seems to be in such good spirits and he's communicating a lot of love through his brother who is posting for him.  It's really scary!

Speaking of hearts... Jarrett and I have officially gone grocery shopping and are stocked up and ready to follow more of a Mediterranean diet.  We are having an Italian Salmon Bread Salad tonight, and stuffed eggplant tomorrow.  I have some skewers with cherry tomatoes, fresh basil, and a little mozzarella with olive oil as a snack today.  I have been easing into eating raw tomatoes, and eating this kind of snack is definitely a step forward to being a tomato person :P  We got a ton of vegetables, red wine, greek yogurt, and we already eat whole grains and nuts.  Jarrett is kind of starting at a different place vegetable wise, so his vegetable snack is celery and peanut butter. to start.  I also have popcorn he can pop over the stove with olive oil.  He likes that.  Just trying to keep him from eating out!

This weekend, the choir sang in two separate prisons.  I have never been in a prison before, and it was a bit intimidating. 
Some of these people were in for sexual assault, and some for murdering their own children, among other crimes. It's really quite hard to describe what happened, but we sang for them, and they knew the songs, so they sang with.

Somewhere in the Bible it talks about how Jesus is being criticisized for hanging out with criminals.  But he says, don't they need God all the more? Since they are so broken?  And I could see in the people who had come to know Christ in prison that in their brokenness, they have received grace on a far deeper level than I.  And consequently, their faith is so much more tangible and profound.  They had fallen so low, and they had to be pulled up higher. 

In the same sense, their music was more profound.  They didn't just sing from shallow hearts.  They were up, dancing, clapping, singing from the very depths of their soul. 

I have performed with international soloists, professional symphony members, people from all over the world, In Brazil, in Gernmany, in Switzerland, even the rock band Kansas, and I have never seen music like this before.  These other people can sure teach you about technique and breathing and how to refine your music.  But these prisoners taught me about music itself.  The pure, raw thing that swells up from your bones that you just can't learn in school.

In that sense, I think these were the best musicians I have ever made music with.  And God is still providing me opportunities to learn and play and grow as a musician, in ways I didn't expect, but in the ways I desperately wanted.

Nevertheless, all the hours spent preparing for the trip and on the trip knocked me out, and my boss gave me the morning off.  I spent my time cutting up vegetables and preparing easy snacks for the week so Jarrett can just go in there and grab what he wants easily.  I also baked cookies!  I want to keep our baked goods down to once a week, but the most important thing is to stop going out, so that means start stocking up my kitchen with food that Jarrett really enjoys.


[ Previous Entry - Next Entry - Diary Contents - Calendar View ]

[ ]

Comments:

by hopes alibi, 03-04-13 10:43 PM   
I really have to ask and there probably isn't a nice way to put it. Err, why did you guys sing for people who were there for sexual assault and murdered their own children?
by lostwingsxoxo, 03-05-13 10:19 AM   
Christians believe that every single person is capable of selfishness, hate, anger, defensivenesss, manipulativeness, overindulgence, etc. What people call sin. We do it on different degrees. I got frustrated and told Jarrett he was pushing the cart in the grocery story wrong the other day, and I showed him how to do it right, but there really is no "RIGHT" way to do the cart in the grocery store- just my way. But I was exerting control over the situation and creating conflict when he could very well push it however he pleases. This is an example of being controlling on one side of the spectrum. On the other side of the spectrum, you have sexaul assualt- an effort to control another person to do things that are pleasing to you.

There are people in music school that are really egotisical and are kind of mean, and when I see their success, I get so angry and disgusted. When I am truly honest, I wish they would fail completely. This is a form of anger and hate on one side of the spectrum. On the other side, perhaps you have child murder.

The point is that life is so confusing, and it is possible for people to lose their bearings and fall so deeply and become so twisted, that they do awful, horrible things like this. And they deserve every punishment they receive.

But Christians do believe that the truth can become clear, and you can truly repent and be forgiven for the awful things you have done, no matter how horrible they are. And people who have become Christians in the prison, who repent of what they have done, see it in its complete truth- the horror and devastation- well, they can be forgiven.

We are so messed up as people that we cannot change ourselves. So when you see somebody who has killed somebody, you can say, well could you possibly trust them again? They have fallen so low. They have shown a terrible capability for doing something awful. It is truly only by God's grace that any of us, especially these people, can be changed.

God's grace means teaching and changing somebody's heart. Bringing them back to the way they were created to be, which is good- full of love, putting God and others before oneself. You can only do that if you understand where you went wrong, accept your punishment, and be forgiven, and forget the awful wrong you've done in the past and move forward.

So we sing songs about this to give them hope that they can change through God. There is something seriously mentally and spiritually wrong with people who do these things, and we do this to minister to them both mentally and spiritually. People need to know they are lovable to be loving. They need to believe there is good in themselves that will prevail over EVERY evil in order to have hope.

I think that is a really good question, and I hope my explanation made some sort of sense!

   

About
 | 
Copyright
 | 
Privacy policy
 | 
Site rules
 | 
Help